Bedtime Stories

Off Course, Keep Looking

Off Course, Keep Looking

on May 20, 2017, 6:56 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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MOMS

MOMS

on May 14, 2017, 8:35 AM / in Bedtime Stories

After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, “I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you.” The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who had been a widow for […]

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Oh, the Irish!

Oh, the Irish!

on May 13, 2017, 8:00 AM / in Bedtime Stories

H/T to Thomas I was at the pub the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Gaelic, so I approached and asked, “Hello, are you three lassies from Ireland?” One of them angrily screeched, “It’s Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!” So I apologized and replied, “I am so sorry. Are […]

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The Castaway

The Castaway

on May 12, 2017, 9:36 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special thanks to Thomas One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon. “It’s certainly not a ship,” he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft. Suddenly, […]

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I’M SORRY I BROUGHT IT UP

I’M SORRY I BROUGHT IT UP

on May 10, 2017, 9:58 AM / in Bedtime Stories

By Pat Shannan  /  A Nation Beguiled North Korean Humor… Kim Jung Un had NO military experience whatsoever before Daddy made him a four-star general. This snot-nosed twerp had never accomplished anything in his life that would even come close to military leadership. He hadn’t even so much as led a Cub Scout troop, coached a sports team, or commanded a […]

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Remember Slow Food?

Remember Slow Food?

on May 10, 2017, 9:28 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special Thanks to Thomas ‘Someone asked the other day, ‘What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?’ ‘We didn’t have fast food when I was growing up, I informed him. ‘All the food was slow.’ ‘C’mon, seriously. Where did you eat?’ ‘It was a place called ‘at Home,” I explained ! ‘Mom cooked every day and when […]

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A Curious Mom

A Curious Mom

on May 3, 2017, 8:02 AM / in Bedtime Stories

John invited his mother over for dinner one evening. During the meal, she couldn’t help but notice how attractive his roommate Judy was. She had been suspicious of a relationship between her son and his roommate for quite some time, but this only made her more curious. She watched the two of them interact over the course of the evening […]

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OK What is the Answer?

OK What is the Answer?

on May 2, 2017, 8:02 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Question for the IRS Special thanks to Thomas ‘Many years ago, I married a widow out of love who had an 18-year-old daughter. After the wedding, my father came to visit a number of times, and suddenly he fell in love with my step-daughter. My father eventually married her without my authorization. As a result, my step-daughter legally became my […]

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President Schumer agrees to bill funding Obamacare, abortionists, but no wall

President Schumer agrees to bill funding Obamacare, abortionists, but no wall

on May 1, 2017, 7:31 AM / in Bedtime Stories, Opinion

What the Dem’s would love to happen….. By Ed Straker The President and Congress agreed to a spending bill to get the government through to September. (Wish To Be)President Chuck Schumer said: “This agreement is a good agreement for the American people and takes the threat of a government shutdown off the table,” said… Charles E. Schumer (D-N.Y.). “The bill […]

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Something that should endear the Business World

Something that should endear the Business World

on May 1, 2017, 6:42 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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100%

100%

on April 28, 2017, 9:09 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special Thanks to Thomas for this one. One Hundred Percent This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. experience. It has an indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud. This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint, and it goes like this: What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? […]

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Racism When It Doesn’t Exist…. Thanks Dems for Being So Open Minded

Racism When It Doesn’t Exist…. Thanks Dems for Being So Open Minded

on April 27, 2017, 7:41 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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Voting Insurance / This AD Provided Strictly for Your Amusment

Voting Insurance / This AD Provided Strictly for Your Amusment

on April 25, 2017, 6:22 AM / in Bedtime Stories

YES. For the first time in America, you can purchase an exclusive  insurance policy to protect your constitutional rights as an American. Never before, and certainly never foreseen by our forefathers, could a citizen find a greater peace of mind come election day, than to embrace the security of “Voter Protection” insurance policy. This policy ensures the registered and insured […]

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Perils of a Catholic Upbringing… Warning, Not for Children

Perils of a Catholic Upbringing… Warning, Not for Children

on April 24, 2017, 9:13 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Thank you brother Thomas As I walked down the busy sidewalk, knowing I was late for Mass, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days. Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow contaminate them. Recalling my old pastor, Father Mike, who always […]

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OH, THE SWEET TRUTH OF IT ALL

OH, THE SWEET TRUTH OF IT ALL

on April 23, 2017, 9:02 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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Go Outside And Enjoy Nature

on April 23, 2017, 8:30 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Don’t just sit in the House: go outside and enjoy nature.   Never mind people…just go back inside and watch TV…it is safer at your age!!   Special Thanks to Thomas

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Know Your State Motto

Know Your State Motto

on April 17, 2017, 6:00 AM / in Bedtime Stories

We have decided to tick everybody off all at the same time and get it over with… so suck it up and smile while you are laughing at everyone else’s state…… KNOW YOUR STATE MOTTO Alabama Hell Yes, We Have Electricity.   Alaska 11,623 Eskimos Can’t Be Wrong!   Arizona But It’s A Dry Heat. Arkansas Literacy Ain’t Everything. California […]

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“As I’ve Aged”

“As I’ve Aged”

on April 12, 2017, 8:10 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Author Unknown Thanks for sharing Thomas “You ask me how it feels to grow older. I’ve learned a few things along the way, which I’ll share with you… As I’ve aged, I’ve become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I’ve become my own friend. I don’t chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my […]

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The Room

The Room

on April 10, 2017, 6:51 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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Trump Shows Obama How to Lead from the Front

Trump Shows Obama How to Lead from the Front

on April 9, 2017, 6:29 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Okay, we understand… it was probably not the right thing to do, that is a preemptive attack on a foreign country. We completely understand why true conservatives would remind us of our Constitution and how Congress is technically responsible for acts of war, but we cannot help but smile.

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