Bedtime Stories

Ouch, That is a little too close

Ouch, That is a little too close

on March 24, 2017, 10:59 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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The unintended consequences of goofy hoplophobes anti-firearm rights Democrat moke demands mandatory open carry I like it sorta

on March 20, 2017, 6:10 AM / in Bedtime Stories, Opinion, State News

This came to us from Jackie 6 years ago and it just made us smile. The unintended consequences of goofy hoplophobes. Anti-firearm rights Democrat moke demands mandatory open carry! I like it! (Sorta.) “Hey, I’m all out of 9mm! Let’s go to WalMart.” From Ammoland.com: A bill in Louisiana would require sportsmen to show the serial number on their firearms before purchasing […]

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The Vacation

The Vacation

on March 15, 2017, 8:11 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Thanks to Thomas A Minnesota couple decided to take their vacation in Florida. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon twenty years ago. Because of difficulties in their hectic job schedules ,they couldn’t get off at the same time. So the husband decided to fly to Florida ahead of his wife. So the husband […]

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The Phone Call

The Phone Call

on March 8, 2017, 7:49 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg, ‘Hello?’ ‘Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?’ ‘No, Daddy. She’s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.’ After a brief pause, Daddy says, ‘But honey, you haven’t got an Uncle Paul.’ ‘Oh yes I do, and he’s upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now..’ Brief Pause. ‘Uh, okay then, this is what I […]

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God Made a Democrat – The David Boze Show, KTTH-Seattle

on March 8, 2017, 6:00 AM / in Bedtime Stories

God Make A Democrat – KTTH 770, Seattle, The David Boze Show / Thank you to Dodge and Paul Harvey for inspiration of this parody

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Some Humor for this Day

Some Humor for this Day

on March 7, 2017, 8:21 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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So God Made a Liberal

on March 7, 2017, 8:07 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special Thanks to Richard

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A New Baby/New Technology

A New Baby/New Technology

on March 5, 2017, 2:41 PM / in Bedtime Stories

This is not for children nor the faint of heart….. H/T to Thomas A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the baby’s father, without the need for any […]

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Cowboy Named Bud

Cowboy Named Bud

on March 4, 2017, 8:22 AM / in Bedtime Stories

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many […]

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Tom’s scrotum

Tom’s scrotum

on March 3, 2017, 8:39 AM / in Bedtime Stories

One of the Best Stories of the Year: The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, “I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and […]

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Until Death Do Us Part…

Until Death Do Us Part…

on March 1, 2017, 9:38 AM / in Bedtime Stories

In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the fortune teller delivered grave news: “There’s no easy way to tell you this, so I’ll just be blunt. Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year.”Visibly shaken, the woman stared back at the old woman’s lined face, then at […]

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You will Love This Doctor

You will Love This Doctor

on February 26, 2017, 8:30 AM / in Bedtime Stories

PoppaGringo sent me this regarding his doctor. But, he said the waiting list for him was so long, it would be useless to seek his services. Questions to my doctor: Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it… Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear […]

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The Retirement

The Retirement

on February 24, 2017, 6:00 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Knowing a great deal of politicians, past and present, I find this both funny and quite a bit scary…. A Priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner. However, since […]

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Trash pick-up / There is Always a Way

Trash pick-up / There is Always a Way

on February 23, 2017, 6:00 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special Thanks to Lenore for this one. I have a friend who is president of his homeowners association in the Dallas, Texas suburbs. They were having a terrible problem with litter near some of his association’s homes. The reason, according to my friend, is that six very large, luxurious new houses are being built right next to their community. The trash […]

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We could have sworn someone got the message

We could have sworn someone got the message

on February 22, 2017, 8:29 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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“I’d Rather Be In Hell”

“I’d Rather Be In Hell”

on February 22, 2017, 8:08 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Special Thanks to Thomas by Paulo Coelho “As soon as he died, Juan found himself in a gorgeous place, surrounded by all the comfort and beauty he had dreamed of. A fellow dressed in white approached him and said, “You have the right to have whatever you want; any food, pleasure or amusement.” Charmed, Juan did everything he dreamed of […]

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They Walk on Water

They Walk on Water

on February 21, 2017, 8:26 AM / in Bedtime Stories

Thanks to Thomas for this one. All of his life George from Cape Breton had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21stbirthday. On that day, they’d walk across the lake to the boat club for their birthday cake. So when George’s […]

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The Irony of it All

The Irony of it All

on February 16, 2017, 4:07 PM / in Bedtime Stories
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Keep that Guard Up….

Keep that Guard Up….

on February 13, 2017, 6:58 AM / in Bedtime Stories
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What is that Sound?

What is that Sound?

on February 12, 2017, 7:46 AM / in Bedtime Stories

H/T to Thomas and Larry Here is a classic joke for any Marine. Tell this joke to someone who is not a Marine: A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a U.S. Marine Corps base. He goes to the front gate, and says to the sentry, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay […]

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